Random memories

So before I close this blog, I wanted to share some of the sporadic memories and blessings of the summer, so let's take a trip down memory lane together, shall we?

- Ted Yeats and his giant sign meeting me at the airport, kissing me on the cheek before I stepped into this crazy bubble that would challenge me in so many ways
- Sharing prayer requests with Christa, Dan and Tim, praying for each other's anxieties - we were all collectively bound in uncertainty about the summer. We had no idea what we were in for :)
- Eating at Chipotle after orientation, having my photographic memory tested...I failed, but I'm pretty sure the test was biased.
- Shan, Jonah and I moving in and sharing our stories on the couch in 309
- Being convinced that Jonah didn't like me for a full 3 weeks, and then being overjoyed one morning when things changed...I still don't know what changed...but I'm so glad they did.
- Having my boss tell me that the #1 rule in this town is that you do what you have to in order to get ahead. Rule #2 is that cabbies can do whatever they want.
- The Presidents Dinner - how prestigious and honored I felt to be in charge of watching the volunteer room :)
- Stephen and I going out for a burrito randomly after work one night and having awesome conversations
- Katers, Christa and I buying matching green Georgetown hoodies
- Drew, Stephen and I going out to Uno's for dinner, talking about the "Republicans" and "Democrats" benches, deciding that, collectively, we are Nancy Pelosi. I also drank a lot of soda. Then we went to a movie...Evan Almighty? I saw so many movies this summer...Stephen's fault.
- Watching The Office on the projector in 309 and knowing that we are united by the humor of Michael Scott.
- Every time I ever ate lunch with Jenna...we must've gone out to lunch...a lot.
- Stuffing envelopes at work, papercuts galore
- Talking to angry immigration constituents who thought I was someone important
- Walking to the White House one evening, playing in the fountain outside the International Monetary Fund (until we were asked to leave), ringing the doorbell to the White House, seeing W's dog (well, we're pretty sure that's what it was...or a large squirrel)
- Going to Friendship Heights for my birthday - Jonah planning out a wonderfully beautiful dinner at the Cheesecake Factory complete with a candle and singing, Tim planning an adventure to a karaoke bar that I will haunt my dreams for years to come, loving every minute of the whole celebration
- Random birthday trip to...Wheaton, Maryland?! Who does that? Just to play guitar at Chuck Levin's: Everything in Music?!? It may have been completely crazy...but I think it's my favorite memory from the whole summer.
- Tim's random Metro connections that led to an East Wing Tour (times yelled at = 3)
- Dinner with Drew and Tim at Tortilla Coast, not sure how I ended up there...but it was fun
- How we always ended up together at Starbucks on Sunday, finishing up our Bible Studies
- Ahmed, such a good guy, and his guitar which was like manna from heaven (sacrelig)
- Dinners with Jonah, talking about God and life - some of my most treasured conversations
- Team dinners with the (room) 207 boys, we never had that popscicle eating contest, but then again we gotta have something to do when we have our reunion
- "What's THAT supposed to mean?!?"
- DELAWARE DELAWARE DELAWARE
- Karey Yeats telling us the most romantic story ever to be written on the hearts of humankind
- "You know what they say..."
- Everything Trip ever said
- My family visiting, staying at the Watergate and taking me out to dinner
- Touring the Washington Monument, Archives, and the Capitol with the 'rents and friends
- Taking long walks by myself to the Lincoln Memorial, Jefferson Memorial, Georgetown, etc. just to try and listen to what God was trying to tell me
- Night tour of the Memorials with Zach, Drew and Dan, getting a picture with Abe himself
- Night tour of Marine Corps Memorial, having fun in Rosslyn, running through weird rows of lights, Smeltzer and his camera, the mean Burger King lady who squashed Dan's milkshake hopes
- All the lilies, they were everywhere and gorgeous (Song of Sol. 2:2)
- Crying to Christa, Joy, Jonah, Amy and Tara and being comforted without reservation
- Beautiful roses from secret admirers, though I know who mine was from ;)
- Roommate talks that lasted well into the morning hours
- Pentagon tour, seeing the 9/11 Memorial, everything becoming very real
- Wearing flip flops everyday at work
- Dinner at Buca's, yelling all the way down the table, using our Italian manners
- Learning to love the Metro, beginning to hate escalators
- Jonah throwing herself in the way of the doors on the Metro one morning, sacrificing herself in order to maintain the continuity of the group
- Smeltzer pulling a Superman at the Dunn-Loring Metro stop, halting the train by sheer demonstation of strength
- Seeing how God brought each of these people into my life for a reason, sometimes for many reasons, and understanding how He uses them to show me His love
- Hearing God talk to me as though He were as close as my own heart
- Having the privilege to love people, especially when my heart breaks for them
- Having the privilege of sharing Truth with many and having God use me as an instrument of His will in their lives
- Being completely open and honest with others, and never having to feel ashamed of wanting to love people
- Weeping almost the whole flight home, thinking about all God has taught me and how He has used others to teach me as well, overflowing with thankfulness and praise

To my beloved teammates - I miss you already. Before I arrived in DC this summer, I asked God to help me to be open with all of you, regardless of the outcome. He has proven faithful once again! Guarding your heart is important, yes, but I don't want it to ever stop me from moving toward others in love. And it hurts not having you guys here with me right now - I feel like I've given pieces of my heart away. And some would say that's dangerous and reckless, but it is where I believe God has called me to be at this point in my life.

"Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord." ~ Romans 12:9-11

I have so much hope for you in how God will lead you for the rest of your lives. You are all very special to me, and I will treasure those pieces of you that I've acquired over the summer. Thank you so very much for leading when it was difficult and loving when it was most needed. God's goodness shines through all of you - thank you for offering up your lives to serve Him, thereby laying down your lives for your brothers and sisters.

See you in Stephen's cube in a year or two :) And I'll bring the popscicles.

I love you guys.

Jess

Dela-what?

Hey everyone!

Just a quick update on my life since the last post. Last weekend we had the women's retreat (and the men had their respective retreat as well) and we decided to go to Rehoboth Beach, which is in the great state of Delaware. We left first thing on Saturday morning, I rode with Karey Yeats and Katers (Katie), Christa, and Jonah (Caitlin) all the way to the eastern edge of the continent. It took a bit longer than expected due to construction and traffic, but after eating lunch we got to the beach around 1 or 2 in the afternoon. It was PACKED but we managed to find an adequate spot to spread out and lounge. I went in the water with Christa for awhile, can I just say - wow - it was COLD! It took some getting used to, reminded me of good ol' North Carolina. So after that I came back and took a brief nap in the sun, read a lot (a lot for me, I probably read for a little over an hour) and took a walk with Katers and Tara up and down the boardwalk.

After we were done soaking up the sun, we headed to the Summer House for dinner. It was a very nice "beachy" restaurant with good food and a friendly waitstaff. We decompressed, talking about the day, the many adventures (a few seagull bombers, Katers' amazing sunglasses raccoon-tan, how amazing the beach was in general), and finally got back in the car and headed for Newark, DE, home of the University of Delaware.

We checked into our hotel (which had FREE cookies, FREE snowcones, FREE coffee - this place was a college student's DREAM) and relaxed, awaiting news on the rest of the weekend. We convened in Tara, Christa and Katers room to deliberate the next days' activities. Let me tell you - it was like watching C-SPAN. We started calling ourselves "The Senator from ___" and Amy played Majority Leader as she guided us to make a decision. It took FOR-EV-ER. Just like the Senate, actually. At one point Katers called the front desk and talked to "Michael" who was more that happy to give us some ideas of what to do. We were all so tired and Katers phone presence was just so hilarious that most of us couldn't keep it together when she was on the phone, she just sounded so...engaged with what he was saying. Even Karey almost fell off her chair at one point because she was laughing so hard.

So we decide to check out some of Michael's ideas in the morning. Turns out they were all duds (thanks for nothing Michael) so we decide to go to Annapolis, MD instead. We went to the Naval Academy which had a really gorgeous chapel and some really gorgeous naval officers. We spent some time scouting the place out and then went to Chick and Ruth's Delly for lunch (you should google them and check out their website - its awesomeness is just to complex for me to write about). After a Starbucks run to round out the day, we were back in the car heading home. Its weird to think of DC as home, but as we crossed the bridge from Arlington going into the city, thats exactly how I felt - like I was going home.

The boys got back later that evening and we had fun swapping stories and adventures before heading to bed to start the long week.

I still need to update about the Pentagon, but I don't have time for that right now. So I'll do it later. Hope you're all having a stellar weekends! Praise God for beautiful weather!

Jess

Honestly - where does the time go?

So...

My humblest apologies for not updating. There's really no excuse. Other than my inattentiveness.

So where did I leave off...oh yes. Birthday weekend. So Tim had asked me earlier in the day what I wanted to do for my birthday. I thought really hard and decided that my birthday would be perfect if I could get my hands on a guitar and play for awhile. As turned out, we decided to go to Silver Spring, MD where there was a guitar store. We were getting on our Metro train at Union Station and we saw Tara, my roommate, who was getting ready to go out with her co-workers. We told her to get on the train with us instead, not telling her where she was going. She did it - man she must trust us. I can only imagine what she must have been thinking as we rode farther and farther into Maryland...

We got off in Wheaton, MD, basically the middle of nowhere. No map, no directions, just an instinctual sense of my guitar-playing destiny. We found the place (miraculously) and wandered into the acoustic room. Let me tell you - there was NO better place to be on my birthday than in a room filled with guitars after being deprived for 6 weeks. I played a really nice guitar for awhile and then Tim started playing...turns out he's really good. Like, really good. He knew some praise songs so we filled that acoustic room in Wheaton, MD with as much joyful noise as we could. They employees probably thought we were nuts. Jorge, the very nice guitar salesman, found out it was my birthday and very artfully played me happy birthday on a wickedly expensive guitar. I'm not sure I could've asked for anything more on my special day!

But there was more, oh yes, there was more. We got back on the Metro to head to Silver Spring where we met up with Amy and Jason for dinner at "Eggspectation", a restaurant devoted to the skillful preparation of the egg. I had a mango burger.

So, I got a call that week from none other than Mr. Tim Woodbridge himself. As it turned out, he was in the city for a mission trip! Since I had Wednesday (July4th) off, we planned on meeting up to spend the day hanging out around DC. It was so weird to have someone from Purdue infiltrate my DC life! We went to the parade with my roommates and Shenanagins (Shannon) and ate lunch afterwards downtown. We met up again in the afternoon, hung out at GW, played spades with Stephen and Christa, and made our way down to the Mall for fireworks. The fireworks were the best I've ever seen - probably the best I'll ever see - and it was so awesome to be with so many friends, just enjoying the colorful show.

Afterwards, I said goodbye to Tim, wishing him the best as far as getting back to his place of residence for the week. It was fun to have him around for a day, especially when you think of when you said "goodbye" weeks ago, thinking you'll never see this person again, and then having them show up on your doorstep!

The rest of the week turned out to be difficult, emotionally-speaking...I think it had just been a stressful week, with entertaining and planning for when my parents were to come visit. God has revealed to me that I have control issues on many levels, including being very hard on myself in restricting how much love I allow myself to feel from others. I never want to hope for more in a relationship, because of the possibility that it won't happen and I'll look like a brokenhearted idiot.

God has been so faithful in revealing things about myself that I never thought I struggled with - and He's teaching me how He protects my heart, and that I don't have to anymore. Its so funny - I ran across my prayer list for this summer that I had given a few people that spelled out areas in which I wanted to grow. I had a hard time putting the list together because I had very little idea of what the summer was going to look like. But one of the things I listed was:

• Pray that I would not try to be strong (mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually) on my own, but that I would trust God to take care of me and protect me.

Good grief, people. And I was wondering why exactly God was doing what He was doing. I guess what I didn't understand when I wrote that was how much it would hurt. I have hurt deeply so much this summer, not because I'm with terrible people or I've had a terrible time, but simply because God is ripping out the infrastructure of my identity. I thought removing core lies from my life was going to be more like taking a box out of a closet; as it turns out, a core lie is like a rotting, load-bearing column in the middle of your house. Sooner or later, the house is going to collapse, because it can't support the weight of Truth I keep filling the house with. So here I am, in the middle of the house of my identity with a sledgehammer, terrified with every swing that the whole thing is going to come down. And it will - it has to - and I have to trust that God is going to protect me when it crumbles around me.

The bottom line is that discipline is never easy, and its never painless. But it is for the best - it brings us nearer to God. So thanks for praying the tough things for me, even though it doesn't always leave me with warm fuzzies. I take comfort in Proverbs 3:11-12, and that God has put me with people here that are willing to invest in me selflessly.

Wow, that was long. And I didn't even get through a week. Good grief. Oh well.

Thanks for your prayers, your support, and your love - I miss you all!

Love,

Jess